Who Are the People in Your Neighborhood? Part 1 of Many.

The Bahamut server is home to a very diverse group of people. Nearly all of them suck. Severely. There are some though, that have managed to prove themselves not as stupid or annoying as the rest. The majority of these people belong to the MoogleArmy linkshell like me. A few belong to various endgame linkshells, but I forgive them. Over the next few weeks and months, I’ll work my way through the ranks of MoogleArmy members with a series of interviews. Some of the questions may repeat, because I'm not keeping track of what I'm asking. There’s no better place to start than with the top. She’s the rock-solid foundation of the MoogleArmy. When she speaks the entire linkshells shuts the fuck up and listens. For the most part, anyway. The Tarutaru extraordinaire Kyssandra. (As I don't have a program to capture the text box, I just used the MA website mail system to send the questionnaire. Questions will be in BOLD. Her responses are unedited and will appear in ITALICS. Any additional comments by me will be in parentheses.)

So, how long have you been playing FFXI?

I've been playing off and on since around the ps2 release which was close to Summer 2004. So I guess that makes it about 3 years now.

From what I’ve seen, you use mainly mage jobs. Not counting Beastmaster, have you ever leveled a melee job? Which ones and how far?

I did level mnk(9), war(18), and nin to 37 but that was just to compliment my mage jobs. As for leveling a melee job just to have one, I did try thf once.. got it to 3.. or maybe that was 2 then got bored.

How did you choose your character’s name?

Kyssandra was the name of a npc guild leader in a text based MUD (look it up) called DragonRealms. I used the name for my character in EverQuest Online Adventures which carried over to FFXI when we all moved here as a group.

What helped you choose Windurst, the greatest of the three starting countries, as your home country?

First looking at the 3 nation choices I was immediately drawn to Windurst. I liked everything from the music to the outdoor nature theme, it seemed the most fun.

Which do you like more: Bastok or San d’Oria? Why?

Bastok, not that Bastok is anything special but Elvaan tend to be on the arrogant side, it's never a pleasant experience being in Sandy.

Which do you like less: Mhaura or Selbina? Why?

Well lets compare their negative uses. Mhaura has that annoyingly long boat ride to Aht Urghan. Selbina has that annoyingly long Crawler's Nest map quest. Mhaura also has a prime fight which you need lvl 6 fame for, that can be annoying. But Selbina.. is next to dunes.. Selbina wins.

You don’t have to name names, or /point at me, but is there any player(s) that you absolutely despise?

Oh of course there are people I really dislike, though I exercise probably more restraint than most people notice when it comes to them.

Is there any MoogleArmy member you like a little more than the others? *winkwink*

Well that would be you Omael =p.(YES!) I actually like all members who are regulars. (NOOOOO!) By regulars I mean they're on a lot, they talk, they help out, and this is their only LS (excluding endgame). As far as who I like more than others, I do believe in the concept of reciprocity, you get out of a LS what you put into it. There are members who clearly put in a lot more effort than some in the LS, and as a result those people are much more likely to get help when they're in need.

What would you like to see added to FFXI the most? (It can be anything.)

One thing I really dislike about FFXI when compared to other mmorpgs is the way end game works. How some of the hardest HNMs in the game drop complete crap compared to easier HNMs that spawn 21-24 hours. I'd love to see FFXI create a new end game system where the rewards increase in proportion to the difficulty of the battles.

What would you like taken out or changed?

I'd really like to see a bigger xp penalty for people who die for stupid reasons.

If you could be any kind of ingame monster, what would you pick and why?

I'd like to be a lvl 8 besieged HNM. I'd only have to work and make my appearance every few days for no more than an hour. And you get to kill complete idiots, because only a dumbass would go after one of those HNMs thinking they could kill it. (I don't know what that is, but I'll assume it's something strong.)

You and I were in a party in Garlaige on August 10th of 2007 where you were a bard. I was a ninja, and we were maybe 2 levels apart. This wasn’t even a month ago. Now you are getting your Artifact Armor. There were rumors being spread in the linkshell recently that you were some sort of super-leveling mutant or super-leveling robot. Are you a super-leveling mutant, a super-leveling robot, some unholy combination of the two or something entirely different?

lmao. When I set a goal for myself, I usually go after it full force. Of course a lot of it is thanks to having this great linkshell full of awesome members willing to come help me in a moments notice. But as for leveling, I just can't level "every now and then", I level whore and no I'm not a super-leveling mutant or robot -_-.(That's exactly what a super-leveling mutant/robot would say...)

When you decide to leave FFXI forever, what do you want people to remember about you?

I just want people to remember I'm the leader of MoogleArmy and that I contributed in some way to their FFXI experience. And I hope that this LS, that many people call home, continues to live on even after I'm gone.(I'd give MoogleArmy about two months if/when Kyss quits forever before it falls apart.)

Next time: I attempt to expose the dark side (if there is one) of the friendliest, most helpful Galka you ever did meet, Coldwind! Could a heart of pure evil lurk within the depths of that snazzy jacket? And just what is Houzukimaru looking at?

Promyvion: Karmic payback or Stupid Bullshit?

Long ago, in November of 2005, I attempted to beat one of the new Promyvion areas added by the second FFXI expansion. It was a short effort, as our douche bag Ranger warped out after telling us his mommy was kicking him off the computer. Stupid bastard didn’t even own the computer he was on. I don’t know if he’s in this screenshot, but here’s one from that attempt anyway.



Nearly a year later in August of 2006, I attempted one of the Promyvion areas again. Take a look at the screenshot and tell me if you recognize anyone. That’s right; you’re seeing Coldwind and Jedimasta before they were famous. Well, we got all the way to the burning circle fight at the end and died. I decided that it would be a long, long time before I tried one of them again.



Exactly one year and twelve days later: It’s the night of August 20, 2007, and Amiyumi is asking if anyone wants to try a Promyvion. I was bored and agreed. Soon, I would learn that it was a horrible decision. Both of my previous Promyvion attempts were at Dem, so I was hoping maybe Mea would be easier. As I often am about fights, I was very very wrong. We made it to the burning circle fight with little incident, only to be trashed twice before I had to head off to get some sleep. We got the NM down to about 15% hp, but as with most things on FFXI, that was more than enough to kill us all easily.



Now, as some of the linkshell knows, I use mules to make the majority of my money for me. It isn’t very fast since elementals ores can be a bitch to grow, but after four or five months I’ll have a couple million gil to spend on gear and gimpy linkshell mates. After this Promyvion experience, I wonder if this isn’t SE’s way to get back at me for having found a way to make money that doesn't involve fighting the RMTs for NMs. As the Promyvion areas are level capped, I cannot simply buy my way though them. I gladly would if I could, though. I suspect SE knows this, and will never see fit to allow me access to the Tavnazian Archipelago.

Tungi {| Found it! |}

Long ago, before I was overwhelmed by the stupidity of those that shared FFXI with me, I reached level 60 as a warrior/ninja. At that time, I learned of an axe called the Tungi. Hidden deep within the Quicksand Caves and guarded by a faggy Antican that was rumored to bite people on the genitals, the axe was said to contain hidden effects that made the rare/ex item worth the quest. You see, they couldn’t just let you fight the stupid fucking Antican and have him drop the axe. That would be too fucking easy. Instead, you must scurry about the Quicksand Caves in search of a ??? placed on the ground. The ??? was called the Antican Tag, which the homosexual Antican was said to be looking for. Why they can’t just let the Antican pop every couple of hours, I don’t know. What he wanted the tag for, I think it best not to ask. The time I spent wandering about the Caves with no map added up to several days, with no Antican Tag ever found by the time I quit the game. After my return to FFXI, I resumed my search for the tag. As things rare/ex often go with me, I found the tag after only a few hours of searching, but remain unsure whether or not to resume leveling warrior/ninja. With it in my possession, I was ready to kill the goddamn Antican and claim my shiny new Tungi. Or so I thought. Before I quit, the leader of the linkshell I belong to and I attempted to kill the Antican ourselves. We had to fight a few other monsters along the way and made the mistake of bringing the Antican out before she had fully regained her magic points. The Antican killed us both, luckily sparing our genitals. This time, I decided to ask for more help. I asked the entire linkshell to help. Most of them were busy with parties and such, so they could not. Coldwind and Jeangallo where nowhere to be found, but I’m pretty sure they would’ve come out. I don’t mind that, but I would’ve been severely pissed if they were all sitting in town with their thumbs up their asses. Fortunately for me, three brave souls answered the call; Arrmin, a Red Mage I’ve never met before; Larien, one of the few people on my list of trustworthy; and Jedimasta, the Warrior/Ninja that once used my gear to achieve glory. The four of us all traveled through the sands of the Altepa Desert until we reached the entrance to the Quicksand Caves. Goddamn Anticans everywhere, but they could not match the might of everyone but me. Eventually, we found the spot where the Antican could be spawned by trading the Antican Tag away. Immediately after the trade, the Antican pounced, attempting to molest the four of us. This time, with more than just a 75 White Mage with me, the Antican fell! As he died, he dropped the Tungi I so desired as well as about ten different ores. I myself had never seen so much ore drop from one stupid enemy, but that was unimportant. The Tungi was mine! Jedimasta advised me to use it and a Darksteel Axe +1 the next time I want to party as war/nin. As my off-hand weapon is the Bloodsword I don’t think I’ll bother with the +1 Axe. Here’s a picture I took after I got the Tungi. I’m not sure where Arrmin ran off to, but he's not in this one.

Sharing is Caring….and The Omael Quest (echo)

Loaning people gear that I’m not currently using has always been something I’ve been willing to do. People rarely ask me though, which I attribute to my own fairly cantankerous nature. Several months back an up-and-coming war/nin named Jedimasta was desperately in need of a Haubergeon. Go look what it is up if you don’t know, the blog won’t be going anywhere. Here’s a picture of me wearing one with my NPC in Eldieme Necropolis:


Anyway, Jedi needed a Hauby or he’d be a gimp. Gimps are the bane of FFXI, and anyone that gets to level 60 with gimp gear needs to be shot. Scratch that. Anyone that gets to level 40 with gimp gear needs to be shot. Myself, I was tired of trying to level war/nin on about two hours of playtime each night, so I told Jedi he could have my Haubergeon and Assault Earring. I don’t remember if I said to borrow or keep. A couple weeks later, I quit the game. When I returned earlier this year, I learned that not only did Jedi still have my Haubergeon and Assault Earring, but he had leveled all the way to 75. I admit to being surprised, but I learned long ago that I was a slow leveler compared to the rest of the linkshell I belong to. Soon after I returned, one of the linkshell members named Quickswipe was leveling thief. I ran into her (as Quickswipe is a Mithra, I will refer to the character as “her”.) in Jeuno and got to see what gear she was using. It was good, but not great. I offered to let her use my Leaping Boots for a while, provided that they are returned. After a while, Quickswipe stopped leveling thief and retuned the boots. I was intrigued at the idea of using my wealth to accumulate enough favors with linkshell members that my Beastmaster af quests would be a cakewalk. I have since decided to lend my gear out to linkshell members I deem trustworthy enough, in return for future help with af coffers and whatnot. There is a physical list of people on a sheet of printer paper next to my computer that I am willing to loan my better gear to, which I make changes to over time. Recently, I’ve begun to entertain the idea of resuming my war/nin career. My mule plantation has paid off nicely, and allowed me to buy the gear my war/nin would need, except for a Haubergeon, Assault Earring and scroll of Utsusemi: Ni. Lo and behold, I spoke with Jedi and he returned my old gear! Jedi was going to buy a Hauberk for himself anyway and had better earrings than the assault, so he didn’t need my old stuff anymore. Some time later (maybe two days), I learn that Kyrek is leveling war/nin and is also in need of a Haubergeon. I was still on the fence about leveling the job again, so I didn’t want to let him borrow mine. I thought for a few minutes of a way to help this Tarutaru, since he was another member of the linkshell that seemed fairly entertaining and learned (that’s pronounced “lurnid”, not “lurnd”). He was already borrowing one of my Woodsman’s Rings and my Garrulous Ring, and as he hadn’t sold them yet I knew helping him would be a good idea. Kyrek is also a level 75 white mage, and knowing one of those is also a good idea. He was talking about getting a Damascus ingot from some NM and getting a blacksmith to make him a Haubergeon. The linkshell was talking about World of Warcraft at the time, and I was struck with inspiration; a quest as stupid and asinine as those that populate what I consider the faggiest shitpile of an OnlineRPG. The Omael Quest (echo), I call it. It was simple, yet epic. Incredibly stupid, yet incredibly great (that’s great meaning important; highly significant or consequential). Basically, it was what every quest in World of Warcraft was; a fucking fetch quest. Thus, I spoke unto Kyrek: “Bring unto me a Scroll of Utsusemi: Ni and 1 Red Terrapin, Kyrek of Windurst, and the Haubergeon of Ungimptitude shall be yours.” I don’t think Kyrek quite believed me at first, but I was and still am entirely serious. I then bought a Haubergeon and stole it away in my Mog House, where it still waits for its diminutive yet powerful owner to claim it. The overly-dramatic wordage there is to reflect World of Warcraft’s in-game dialogue. I have been asked a few times about wanting the single Red Terrapin. The turtle is symbolic. If it were World of Warcraft I would’ve wanted 30 Red Terrapins, 20 Elshimo Newts, and 25 Gold Lobsters. I have no interest in getting that much worthless crap traded to me. Perhaps, in a few months, another desperate linkshell member will mention needing a Haubergeon or some other high-priced piece of gear that I can buy for them, and then trade for something I actually need. A second Omael Quest....

I Hate San d’Oria

Before you go any further: If you are a citizen of San d’Oria or Elvaan or if you just really like the city, that’s fine. This isn’t your blog, so don’t take anything too personally. Pussy.

San d’Oria. Without a doubt, it is the worst starting city the in the whole fucking game. I recently held my nose and headed back to San d’Oria to level woodworking from 47 to 50, and my visit reinforced my view. A few reasons why….

1. It has a church that nobody ever attends.


Just about every RPG in recent years has some kind of stupid religion, and San d’Oria is home to FFXI’s. I don’t know what they worship here, probably cock. Jeuno also has a church, but I like Jeuno.

2. It has Elvaans everywhere.


After Lord of the Rings was written (and probably before), elves became popular amongst the fantasy dork crowd. Everyone wanted to be an elf, because they were man-pretty and got more elf pussy than they knew what to do with. Probably. While I do like that SE made the Elvaan pretty goddamn ugly, they’re still fucking stupid. I really can't tell the difference between the Elvaan genders most of the time. Most of the really fucking retarded people I’ve encountered were Elvaan, so that doesn’t help them much either.

3. Big Gay Medieval/Fantasy Stereotype


If an RPG doesn’t have a castle, it doesn’t count as an RPG. The one has a French name, which is one strike. It’s crawling with Elvaan, and that’s two strikes. Some douche bag is in the background of my screenshot, which isn’t really the castle’s fault. The castle is fucking ugly though, and that is the castle’s fault. Strike three, baseball sucks.

4. The Mog House entrance looks like a prison gate.


If they lowered that portcullis, I would’ve been trapped in there. We all know what happens in prison…..It also happens pretty much everywhere in San d’Oria, so don’t ever /bow. Or wear a subligear.

5. Bagpipes and a snare drum do not mix with a French horn.

I don’t know who thought that shit would be a good idea for music, but they need to be shot. The French horn isn’t exactly a loud instrument, and teaming it up with the two gayest musical instruments should be a fucking crime. A snare drum is only needed before somebody dives into a pool of water from really high up. Bagpipes have always and will always be fucking gay. Anything that requires you to wear what looks like a skirt isn’t worth doing, unless you’re a tranny or something.



Just to be fair, I’ll list the good things about San d’Oria.

1. Bastokan/Windurstian Consulates.


It’s a little slice of Windurst in a sea of gayness. Only here can you escape the surrounding horror. If the woodworking guild would only move inside here, things would be much better.

2. The Airship docks.


The best thing about San d'Oria is getting the fuck out of San d’Oria. Myself, I like to “/em flips off faggy San d’Oria” right before the airship takes off. I’ve gotten a few tells from people that have gotten mad about it. Amazing how they seem to get madder when I tell them to fuck off.


On a side note: While I was talking about doing the quest to get a Quadav Barbut, Kats offered his to me. I can’t remember if he said to keep or to borrow, so if he ever wants it back, he just needs to send me a /tell. Kats once again shows why he is one of the few players I have any respect for, and the Barbut looks pretty sweet. The beastmen helms themselves are kind of disturbing, though. It’s a fucking beastman’s face you wear on your head. Damn...