Who Are the People Leaving Your Neighborhood?: Me!

The Bahamut server is home to a very diverse group of people. Pretty much all of them suck. Severely. There are some though, that have managed to prove themselves not as stupid or annoying as the rest. Most, if not all, of these people belonged to the MoogleArmy linkshell like I used to. This week I’ll be posting my own answers to my own questions. Groundbreaking, I know. As always, questions will be in BOLD. All responses are unedited and will appear in ITALICS.

How long have you been playing FFXI?
I made my first character, a Hume Red Mage about 4 days after the NA release on the Fenrir server.

How did you choose your character’s name?
Honestly, I didn’t. I hit the name generator until something I thought looked good came up. I was almost Caldyr.

Why did you choose to make your character a Hume?
Elvaan are fucking gay, I thought the Mithras were okay if you like being hit on by sad, sad basement nerds. Galkas were interesting, but I didn’t realize the gap in stats between Humes and mage Galkas or Humes and melee Tarus was so small. I should’ve just flipped a coin between Galka and Tarutaru, but when I saw face 7A I had to pick that one. When I was in college I grew a beard out exactly like it.

I usually see you playing as a WAR. What other jobs do you enjoy playing?
Scholar, actually. I know I didn’t think sch was all that appealing when WoTG was released, but once I started playing it I had fun. Being as versatile as a war in magely matters was cool. Thief also had its moments once I had SATA. Same with Samurai, it had cool moments.

Which do you like less: Norg or Aht Urhgan Whitegate?
Whitegate, easily. Norg might not have anyone in it or all that much to do, but it’ll always be a nice town you can just /sit down in and relax. Whitegate usually had some kind of morons /shouting at each other about something fucking stupid. Nobody cares that you think FF7 was the most awesome of all games ever. You are wrong.

Which do you like more: Jeuno or San d’Oria[S]?
Jeuno is always fun as long as the /shouting idiots aren’t around to ruin everything. The city itself also has a pretty cool design. I won’t let myself get started with what’s wrong in San d’Oria[S].

You’re a pretty big jerk, you know that?
Yes.

Are there any linkshell members you really dislike?
Where do I start? Just scroll down and see if your name is on the bad half of the list.

Are there any members you like more than the others?
Everyone on the good half of the list. They’re what made this game tolerable and occasionally enjoyable for a long, long time.

What would you like to see SE add to the game?
FFXIV to fix what was wrong with FFXI. I don’t want to play a 3d version of Diablo II, I want to play Final Fantasy online with a bunch of idiots that will make me start a blog to complain about them.

What would you like SE to change or remove completely?
The answer above pretty much covers this question too.

If you could be any ingame monster, which would you choose and why?
A Yovra. Although I never got to “sea”, I did read a few stories about what those big UFO-looking bastards can and would do to people.

When you leave FFXI forever, what do you want people to remember about you?
I’ve already left, and what everyone remembers is up to them. If you see a bearded Tarutaru in FFXIV, you might be seeing me.

THE LIST

As I progressed though the years playing this game, I had to wonder:

About the game:

Is PUP the most misunderstood job ever, even though it took Colibri for people to understand what DRGs were capable of all along?

Is NIN the most overrated job ever? (yes)

Why let WARs use nearly every weapon if they’ll suck with all but 3 or 4?

Can SE’s next MMORPG correct the mistakes they made with FFXI, or will it just be a re-skin of World of Warcraft instead?

Why don’t most NMs use different textures than normal monsters around them, instead of just being bigger? Look at Stinging Sophie or Tom Tit Tat for examples. Make TTT a black Mandragora instead, and people would really be able to pick the little guy out. I can’t remember if Leaping Lizzy’s bigger than normal, but if she spawned as one of those gray lizards, that would’ve been cool.

Have there ever been more than 3 female players using Mithras logged on at the same time?

Why are people playing as Galkas usually the best people?

How did SE get a pretty good picture of me in college for face 7A?

Why didn’t every zone get music?

What the hell kind of retard arachnids don’t even have eight legs?

Are the Elvaan the gayest version of elves ever seen, not counting that LARP guy I saw at the gas station right before FFXI was released?

And about my own life:

How did my wife tolerate all the time I spent on this?

Am I really getting older AND wiser, or just older?

If all I’m doing is getting older, why is everyone else getting stupider?

Why are the people who act the stupidest usually the most successful on this game?

Is the game really worth 15 dollars a month?

Are the people you meet there worth 15 dollars a month?

Will it be easy to forget about everything you’ve done, the friends you’ve made and adventures you’ve had in 4 years, even if it was in a virtual world?

People That Made Most My FFXI Time Worth a Damn In the Order I Can Remember Them:

Kyssandra
Mogwae
Tala
Dozer
Coldwind
Houzukimaru
Eyfa
Katsumoto
Quickswipe
Kyrek
Aricelia
Jedimasta
Cyaan
Kaboom
Endrium
Bassetto
Kiris
Larien
Bhaal
Bermont
Godofangels
Alexandrioz – The only person from my first server I can remember one way or the other.
Chewybum

I know I’m missing a few others, but they’ll survive.


People Being Mentioned Because They Suck (No, you don’t get an explanation.):

Meenah
Kisame
Drittz
Oranul
Kelia
Yindragon
Yangdragon
Ropeguy
Thefear
Nephelim or was it Nephilem? Can’t remember the spelling.
Lionsbane
Tifalockhartt
Jammer
Cloudsofflame

Strange how the lists have filled out over the years. Despite not really getting anywhere in any of the expansions’ storylines (CoP is gay) or leveling more than one job to 75, I still think it was a pretty good run and I had a lot of fun despite everyone else. I won’t forget about you guys, and if I ever make my way back I hope you’ll remember me.

Turn out the Lights, Party’s Over

Looks like I won’t be returning to FFXI at all. Slim chance, but the two or three of you still on Bahamut shouldn’t get your hopes up. I’m sure everyone still playing will get over it. I won’t be moving over to any other MMORPG. I played SWG when it first started and it was okay, but FFXI was just more fun. I played WoW for a couple months back when Burning Crusade came out. It’s not a bad game, but it’s just not FFXI. A little cliché, but that’s the way things go. Luckily, I took screenshots of most of my time in Vana’diel so I can present my own experience in my own awesome blog. Which kind of becomes useless since I’m not playing but if blogs are for anything, it’s being useless.

Starting Out


Here’s me on my way out of the dunes finally. I’d just gotten war and mnk to lvl 20, and was exploring Horutoto. Shortly after this was taken, Dopleganger Gog Killed me. Stupid asshole.

Here I am doing what most people did in Qufim, lfg. Back when I started we didn’t have all these fancy-pants “Level Sync” and “Fields of Valor”, and that’s the way we liked it! In fact, the path to Qufim was through the snow and uphill both ways. They changed that to that sissy tunnel right before they put Fenrir in the game.

I’m now at 21, finally getting my chocobo quest done. If you see anyone you know in the background of these, leave a comment. Unless it’s Osker. Everyone’s talked to him before.

I rode my chocobo back to Windurst just in time for the first Halloween. I got a Quadav costume from the NPC and called the whole even retarded. Anyone that was there will agree with me. Anyone that doesn’t agree with me is lying.

Back to Qufim, right outside Delkfutt’s Tower. I don’t know any of these people, but I may have to look them up on FFXIAH.com just to see if they still even play.

Level 24 now, and finally grew my first tree. This would turn into my main source of income when the economy was still inflated. I once had over 35 million gil on me and blew it all in less than a week. Just like real life, the economy is a bitch.

At lvl 30 here, with my shiny new Eisen armor set that came with Chains of Promathia. I never did beat that stupid expansion, but from what I’ve read about it I didn’t miss much. Thanks for trying to drag me through it, Tala. At least you tried.

Sauromugue and killing weapons. Remember when that was new and so very, very exciting? I was also subbing ninja, which is very bad at 30 nowadays apparently. Stupid kids and changing things. Everyone knows everything was better the way it was.

Ah, Garbage Shitadel. I never really had a problem with the zone, so I’m not really sure why it’s called that by some people.

Later…

We’ll skip ahead a few levels and witness me in Altepa fighting Anticans. Probably the best beastman race of any MMORPG I’ve ever played. They’re ants. If they’d just add a Queen Antican the game really would be finished. If they have added one, let me know.

As with most jobs, being a warrior all the time gets boring. I decided to unlock Samurai, and had to beg and plead with the douchebags of Ignited to actually come and help with any of it. Unless Eyfa was on. As s/he was a solo dragoon, s/he was more than happy to come help out as long as it meant killing something. As Eyfa was a Mithra, I have to use the gender-neutral “s/he” when talking about him/her.

Leveling sam can be a lot more fun than war simply because I didn’t really like tanking. Actually, I fucking hated it. You never have to worry about that on sam, though. I don’t think they’ll ever be considered great tanks for any level, unless you’re going to try to turd count (same definition as splitting hairs, nit-pick btw) and tell me they can tank some stupid monsters I’ve never seen and will never see. Up yours, turd counters.

As with most jobs, being a samurai all the time gets boring. I went back to warrior and used my gardening riches to get a shiny new Luisant gloves and a Walkure Mask. I couldn’t find anything exceptionally better than leaping boots, so I’m wearing those. Yeah, I’d be lynched for that nowadays. Well, those weren’t nowadays so fuck off.

The Shitadal basement. Where dreams go to die, or something like that. I didn’t have that problem in my brand new Luisant Haubert. It was about 1.5 million gil back then, too. So not only did I have more money than the rest of the party combined, I also had that sweet blue Mooglearmy linkpearl next to my name. Beat that, Sparkus and Scarlett! Whoever the hell you are.

The Mooglearmy once got a skillup party going in Fei’Yin, and I got invited to work on my sword skill. The 1.6million Bloodsword demanded it. Remember Truce? I know he was a paladin when I joined and I think he quit shortly after. That’s all I know about him. And look, there’s Bermont back when he was a little baby (white?)mage.

When I finally hit 60, I equipped all my artifact armor just to take this screenshot. Son of a bitch, the war sports bra looks stupid.

Here we go on the way to Aht Urhgan. I’ve got my Haubergeon and some of the Sipahi armor set added with that expansion came out. Goddamn boat ride was like 30 minutes, too.

Almost level 70 now, and I found Aricelia! She always had more endgame gear than me, but she also put in the hours to “earn” it. I have to put quotes on earn just because I think the methods used by most endgame linkshells to distribute treasure is fucking stupid if you don’t have 20+ hours a week to play. You can argue with me all you want about this, but it’s my blog so I win and you fuck off.

This one’s of my Samurai finally getting past 60 in Aydeewa Subterrane. MoogleArmy had been deserted, so I have that ugly-ass linkpearl next to my name. I don’t remember what they called themselves, only that Tala got me in and the leader and his in-game girlfriend (IT’S A MAN!) kept calling each other “hun”. Fucking disgusting, seriously. I don’t remember what happened to the rest of the party in the picture, so I’ll assume I killed them all.

For a while, Kyrek wanted the sword Cancer dropped for his warrior. Or paladin, I don’t really remember anymore. Anyway, I went out there for a few hours and helped Kyrek beat Cancer. He’s lucky it’s a crab, because actual cancer’s not nearly as easy to beat or as stupid-looking as the crabs.

End of Days…..

Here’s me at the closest I ever came to endgame gear, which would be considered a decent starter set. Joyeuse, Maneater, that stupid turban with the name, gay purple haste gloves, surfing pants and unicorn boots. Intimidating, I know.

What Engame is supposed to be about: Killing Byakko until he drops his pants. That linkshell I’m with in the pic was a steaming pile, so even if the pants did drop from that one I wasn’t going to be getting them.

Nyzul Isle, on the other hand was actually pretty enjoyable. Get a random party together than run up 5 floors to fight one of the bosses that might drop part of some nice free armor sets. But the drop rate is low, so most of the time we got nothing. Except this one, where I got Goliard Clogs for when I was leveling Scholar. Being the one mage job I actually liked playing I felt I need the clogs even though I was only level 40.

Finally, me with my second “endgame” linkshell, Kazoku. Except for Mogwae (who got me in) and a couple others, it was a collection of douchebags. Especially the leader, who apparently used them to get into an even more “elite” linkshell with an even stupider name. If anyone knows what “kazoku” means let me know. I’m not looking it up myself. As I didn’t have the prerequisite amount of melee/mage jobs leveled, I’m not sure how I got it without actually filling out a gay application.

Next, and final: The List

Taking a Break….

I’ve made a point of keeping my blog free from commenting on anything happening in my real life (as it were). Well, that’s over for this post. Due to my awesome governmental (it IS a word) HR skills I was transferred halfway across the country, and my wife hasn’t exactly been taking the move well. I blame her idiot younger sister who we now live close enough for her/it to visit on a semi-regular basis. There are very few things in the world worse than listening to an arrogant, (probable) eco-terrorist/militant vegan endlessly preach on and on about how fucking wrong it is to eat meat and how animals have all the rights of people (it’s not, and they don’t). I’m too old (graying hair and all) to listen to some dumbfuck career student/coed whore bitch at me for being omnivorous. The inevitable arguments of “don’t eat meat” vs. “fuck you” have of course put undo strain on my wife, who doesn’t deserve it. As far as I can tell, if she’d ever play FFXI with me she’d literally be the perfect woman. So, I won’t be playing all that much for a while. Maybe not for a few days, maybe not for a few months. I do have a couple more entries written, and I’ll upload them somewhere down the road. In the meantime, here’s a screenshot of most of what I do in terms of endgame activities:



That’s right, hide in the shrubs until whatever it is happens to be dead. Ain't life grand?

What’s Left?

My gil is nearly gone, and I have little hope for finding a new source of income. My experiences in endgame have been all bad. I ask for help killing the NM’s inside La Vaule[S] and get only silence. Any other answer would be preferable even if it is “no”. “Where’s your Brutal Earring? Where’s your Byakko’s Haidate?” I keep being asked. All I can think to say is “Help me get them or shut the fuck up about it.” My friendlist is down to one person. My linkshell is gone. Still rank 6 and my progress into the CoP/ToAU/WoTG storylines have all stopped. I have over 200 beastman’s seals and nothing to do with them. There aren’t many bcnms I have the gear to solo other than Treasures and Tribulations, and the Sorcerer’s Ring is too rare a drop to spend the seals on. I can’t solo mobs for the ZNM system, so it is useless. So much of the game is that way: Unsoloable, and therefore beyond my grasp. Merit parties are just like every other xp party: Everyone whines for a bard, and then complains if the party can’t get 25k per hour. Campaign Battle remains, though its appeal is dwindling. What am I still doing here? I wonder how many times I can log out before I stop logging in.

Capitalizing on the Mistakes of Others, or How I got Goliard Clogs.

Recently I was invited to a pickup group doing a few Nyzul Isle 15-20 runs. For any that don’t know, floor 20 is where the feet of the Askar/Denali/Goliard sets drop. The party leader apparently reserved the Askar boots for him, and asked the rest of the party which of the other boots they’d like. With no use for the Denali, I said Goliard. Surely those clogs would provide motivation to get off my lazy ass and level a mage job. I did get black mage to 37, but red and white are somewhere in the 20’s. Scholar’s what I’d like to take to 75 based on what I’ve played of them all. Before I continue, here’s the three drops I’m talking about, courtesy of the FFXI Wiki:







Anyway, I’ve done a few of these 15-20 runs, somewhere in the upper teens. The first goes fine and we clear it, but nothing drops. The second run we get stuck for a few minutes on one of those “Light the lamps in a certain order” floors and run out of time halfway through killing the floor 20 boss. The third we get through everything fast again, and Goliard Clogs drop. Since me and the red mage were the only ones that seemed to actually want them, we both cast our lots. Her: 9 (very me-like) Me: 977. The Goliard Clogs were mine, and the red mage didn’t seem too happy that I couldn’t use them right away. She (I refer to the rdm as a she since it was a Mithra. Chances are it was a guy.) was upset for a few minutes, but didn’t seem to mind all that much after a while. We all had tags for a 4th run, and ran out of time again with the boss at 2%. While I would’ve preferred that Great Axe that let’s you unlock King’s Justice, I’ll settle for footgear I’ll be able to use in the not-so-distant future.

Dynamis, Where the Douchebag is King.

I should have published this back in July sometime.

After complaining about my lack of “endgame” gear for a while, I found my way into a Dynamis only linkshell. The linkshell’s leader is named Drittz, I quickly learned. Someone that names themselves after a faggy dark elf character in a series of stupid “high fantasy” books already has a stike against them in my book (which is superior to regular books). As soon as I saw this guy, there went strike 2 and strike 3. He was Elvaan, and a San d’Orian. He was also a lvl 75 ninja, which is the secret strike 4. Most 75 ninjas are fucking douchebags, with very few exceptions. I was invited to come along for Dynamis – San d’Oria, just to get it cleared. Apparently the boss of each Dynamis area leaves a ??? spot on the ground that gives you a key item you need to access the later areas. It was interesting to learn about how a successful Dynamis is run. About halfway through, one of the mobs dropped the warrior relic boots. Even though this was my first Dynamis ever, I was the only warrior in the whole thing, so Drittz said I could have them. The whole group cleared the Dynamis with very few, if any, problems. I thought this could be something I’d like to do on a consistent basis.



Boy was I wrong. The more time I spent with these people, the more I learned that I really, really didn’t care for them. Nearly all of them are from the same social/endgame linkshell, so I don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about most of the time. Granted, I don’t know what the fuck MoogleArmy’s talking about most of the time but I’ve been there long enough to at least recognize a few names they tend to mention. Drittz is an arrogant douchebag, and more than one person told me he was. Aricelia said so using more curse words than are usually needed, but Aricelia’s bluntness is usually a good thing (Unless she’s talking about me, then it’s her being a bitch). I thought I could put up with all this bullshit as long as I got my Beastmaster relic armor, my only reason for having even a slight interest in Dynamis in the first place. I don’t really care about warrior’s relic armor. I just wanted BST, and I made sure to let everyone around me know it. Anywho, after a few Dynamis runs, clearing Bastok and then doing San d’Oria again, we get to Windurst. This one’s a bitch, apparently. We nearly made it all the way through before we all got killed and ran out of time. What bothered me is that no BST relic dropped. About a month later, we go to Windurst again. This would be my fifth run, making me more than able to lot for whatever relic I had written in my search comment. I was the only person with BST marked, and lo and behold, BST drops from about the 11th mob. Drittz asks who has BST marked, and I say me. He then asks what lvl my BST is, and I once again tell him it’s only 37 but it’s the only reason I’m here. He then declares it a freelot, finally erasing all doubt I had about him possibly not being a huge fucking douche. I cast my lot for it, getting a 997. Nearly everyone else in the ls showed how un-Drittz-like they were and didn’t lot at all. A few did, and I wrote their names down for future reference. Once enough time had passed and the helm was mine, I got a /tell from a Paladin named Cabaal congratulating me on my new helm. I thanked him and had a little talk in /tell about a few things. Maybe five mobs later, a second Monster Helm drops. Simply awesome. If I had lost that helm, which I was the only person in the ls that had it marked in their search comment I would’ve warped away from the whole fucking thing and told Drittz just what I thought about him. Hint: He’s a fucking douchebag. The run through Windurst continued, and we got all the way to the final boss, a big giant Yagudo statue. It’s surrounded by other mobs, so one person has to train them all one way while another provokes the Boss the other way, where the group can kill it. Well, the puller got the train headed one way, but nobody provoked the boss and it went right past us all. Drittz was dead at the time, and he threw a fit like a little sissy girl. I myself couldn’t stop laughing. I fell out of my chair and hurt my shoulder a little, but it was totally worth it. Time expired and we were all kicked out of Dynamis, with Drittz being the only one of us dead. Here’s my favorite screenshot of the last two years: